Plans to work all afternoon didn’t happen. I hoped to sleep in but around 5:45 I was up with the first light. I kissed Char on the head and went to garden for a few hours. It was glorious and my world was the quiet I craved. I could hear the things cars and boats and people chattering cover up: water flowing, wind chimes, hands digging and birds talking.
Char slept in and I received news that Deb Carpenter passed. Another sad day for the Millersport community and our little daycare. I couldn’t shake the feeling of sadness for everyone. Especially her daughter Dena who also works there. Folks that feel like family and people Charlie loves. They have helped him thrive. Deb was battling cancer. Since she has not been able to work it has been a different daycare. It is still wonderful and a place I feel happy to drop off my most precious little guy but her old school care and knowledge meant so much to how everything worked there. A change. Old guard gone.
The last conversation I had with Deb was about how she was sad she couldn’t go to the beach this summer with her family. Too ill. And all the things I put off this summer rushed over me. Including the fact that although I planned to go to the beach I didn’t make it. Today and our health is what really have. We contemplate this when people die or we get sick but we rarely live like it is true. And it is true.
I fumbled around on a guitar and wished I practiced more but decided to write part of a song regardless.
Got up early
The sun was peeking
Dog just a howling and a pacing
You just kept sleeping
Birds could nest in my hair
These feet tired and bare
Stepped in the garden
Still…the neighbors were sleeping
A chink of light on my nose
Dewey grass in between these toes
Down on one knee
Heard myself finally breathing
Moving the dirt, pulling weeds
The dog rolls under that old tree
No tomorrow…no to dos
A better state of dreaming
Gotta slow this pace down
Get to know this fertile ground
Bloom up from these roots
Let’s forget about tomorrow….Today
I sent a pretty horrible video of myself singing it to David as he was just getting into Nashville from the bus and then wished I would have kept it to myself. Then Char and I tried to spend the rest of the day biking and loving each other. We rode down to see some old friends that were in town for an event at the brewery. Char was hot and grumpy from the ride but it made my heavy heart a little lighter just getting to see them.
No photos of art because my art time was all wrapped up in framing and sending some submissions to a few shows. Hopefully I will get one accepted into one of the shows in Nashville. I am feeling excited about just putting myself out there.